7 February 2012, 10:32 pm
First of all theres not enough room for my story but I will try and explain it the best I can. I'm seeing this wonderful woman we have known each other 8 years or better. Unfortunately she lives in Ohio and I live in Illinois. I would say for the first 7 years we talked very briefely but never intended on anything happening. We got ahold of each other early last year and one thing led to another we started developing feelings for each other. Pretty soon she was out here to visit me and I think thats when we first knew that we were in love. Everything was going great and a few months later she came out here again and once again everything went great but then out of the blue she told me she needed some space from me to think about what she wants because the distance was getting to her and she wanted me there with her. Things got progressively worse and needless to say we werent the happy couple we once were. We even talked about marriage several times and moving in with each other. Last week is really when things took a turn for the worse because I got it out of her that she cheated on me just a couple days before I asked her with one of her guy friends. She said part of her didnt regret it because she needed to get laid but part of her did regret it because she knew it would hurt me. Things really got bad a few days ago when we were arguing and she let it slip that she was hiding something from me that would piss me off so bad that I would want to leave her. We established an actual relationship after the first time she came out here. The next day I got her to reveal what she was hiding and it was the fact that for the past two months she had slept with 5 other people one of them she was currently sleeping with and told me she wanted to stop but didnt know if she could because I wasnt there. Her exact words to me were you were the best I have ever had and you are the best thing thats ever happened to me and I wanna stop but I cant because I have tried. Knowing full well how weak our relationship was she told me that after all of this she didnt think she was still going to stop as much as she wanted to. She shows all the symptoms of being a sex addict and I should have realized it the second time she came out here because it seemed like thats all she ever wanted to do. She says she doesnt know what about me turns her on at the drop of a hat but I do. It turns out this friend of hers not only knew she was talking to someone else but didnt care and still kept calling her to come over for sex and spend the night. She told me that he treated her like a slut and anything he wanted her to do she would do without question. She said she didnt mind it and she actually likes it sometimes. She also said though that with me its different because we make love and there are feelings there and there are none with her friend its just sex. She described it to me as "getting her fix." Three days ago she had sex with him again and I asked her do you ever feel any regret afterward and she says yes but I cant stop. She gave me detail about how they do it and what usually goes on and its honestly something you would see in a hardcore porn from the sound of it. She tells me that if and when i move out there that I will be the only person she sleeps with because she has no reason to sleep with anyone else due to the fact shes only doing it because I am not there. I love this woman with all of my heart and have shed many tears and spent countless hours on what I should do. I have tried to imagine my life without her in it and to be honest it hurts worse. I wanna marry this girl and do everything we had planned. I told her that if i ever come across this guy I plan on letting him know in so many ways he messed with the wrong dudes girl but she told me that if i did or said anything to him she would quit talking to me because that is still her friend. I would think as someone she supposedly wants to marry I have the right to say something and take care of business. Then she goes on about how if i tried anything shes afraid for me because hes crazy and all this other stuff so she is even underminding my ability to handle myself. She even went as far as to say if i did win that he would get his friends to jump me and she started making all these excuses for him which really made me mad. I told her that as soon as i move out there any and all communication with him stops because if it doesnt ill be gone as quick as i got there. Was i right in saying all this? What should I do? its been driving me crazy and I cant talk to any of my family about this because they wouldnt understand and to be honest it eats me alive everyday knowing that the woman i wanna marry is getting treated like a slut to someone else and has no problem doing it since I am not there. Correct me if im wrong but if it was true love it wouldnt matter if i was there or in another country. I just dont know what to do. Should I leave her or try to make it work?... Read More »
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